Elvertinafrautoilet - The whole world is in shit

Elvertinafrautoilet woke up feeling a bit bloated, but that was to be expected after a week of consuming nothing but junk food and alcohol. She reluctantly got out of bed and made her way to the bathroom, feeling every bit the disgusting, lazy slob she was. As she lowered herself onto the toilet seat, she let out a long, low sigh. "This better be good," she mumbled to herself, already regretting her decision to not force herself to go to the gym this morning. The moment she pushed past the discomfort and released her bowels, she felt an overwhelming sense of relief wash over her. It was as though the world had become lighter, almost as if her shit was the weight that was holding everything down. She watched in awe as her thick, warm turd slid effortlessly into the toilet bowl, leaving a trail of slime and shit behind it. She couldn't help but lean in closer, her nose almost touching the foul-smelling mess. "My precious," she whispered, her voice dripping with admiration. Without giving herself time to consider the consequences, she reached into the toilet bowl and began to fish out her masterpiece. It was slippery and slimy, but she held onto it tightly, determined not to lose it. She lifted it out of the water, marveling at its size and texture. From there, she did something that no sane person would ever consider. She took her shit and smeared it all over herself, her body, her face, her clothes. She laughed triumphantly as her filth seeped into every pore, every crevice. Everyone else in the world might be oblivious to what was going on, but not her. She was one with her shit now, and they would all know it. Feeling invigorated by her dirty deed, she grabbed her phone and began recording herself. She strutted around her apartment, shoving her phone in front of her flatulent ass and coating her hands in a layer of shit before flipping off the camera lens in triumph. As the video uploaded to the internet, Elvertinafrautoilet took a seat at her computer and waited with bated breath. She watched as people from all over the world clicked on her video, their eyes widening in horror and disgust as they were assaulted by the pungent smell of her shit. "Enjoy my shit," she cackled, her voice echoing across the internet. And enjoy it they did, for better or worse. The world might never be the same again, but at least they would always remember Elvertinafrautoilet and the day she took a massive shit on them all.